My Big Fat Engagement - Engagement Advice & Warnings

We all have some part of us we don’t like, and I don’t think any woman feels more compelled to diet, than the crazy lengths she might go to in the days leading up to her wedding day.

Just remember what you looked like when he slipped that engagement ring on your finger - he loved you the way you were then, so you shouldn’t have to make any drastic changes now!

While it’s always the right time to make healthier lifestyle choices, it is NEVER appropriate to diet dangerously. You don’t want to make yourself sick - you want to look happy and HEALTHY on your wedding day!

Prepare yourself for a long, peaceful married life by getting good at focussing on the positive.

What is your best feature?

Your goal should be to highlight the best things about yourself and draw attention away from your least favorite…

When the Hourglass Is Half Full…

If you are blessed with the curvy part of the bottom half of an hourglass but you’re missing the top, then a full skirt may be your best bet. Select a skirt that falls loosely around your waist - a princess dress with a fitted or strapless top will accentuate your slimmer shoulders, torso, and waist.

This “Shania” southern belle style gown by Bridalonlinestore.com is a great example of simple on top and busy on the bottom - just what you want if your real better half is from the waist up!

bridalonlinestore.com

Here is another great option for this style - the detail along the neckline attracts attention and the a-line cut of the skirt skims the hips and flatters… this one is from lightinthebox.com and available for less than $150.00. Check out the back of the dress too - very pretty!

When the Hourglass is Half Empty

If you have very wide shoulders, you might consider a one-shoulder dress, which will help to balance you out.

Freedom to Bare Arms

Here are some ideas to wrap your arms around when your less favorite body part is your arms. Consider a longer elbow-length veil that will flow around your arms. Other options are a bolero jacket or a wrap, but I don’t favor wearing these during the actual ceremony. For full-time coverage, consider some sleeves. 3/4 length or even cap sleeves might do the trick, depending on your area of concnern.

The dress below by Zaftique is called “Celestial Diva” and costs up to $142.00 - wonderful!

www.zaftique.com

Prints Charming

An all-over print can camouflage curves.

Get a Leg Up

If you don’t want to show off your legs, consider a floor-sweeping gown. Another option: sex up your shoes and ankles and cover the rest!

This dress is by one of my favorite wedding gown designers, Alfred Angelo - reasonably-priced and really elegant at the same time - you can buy the dress below at houseofbrides.com.

houseofbrides.com

Short on Ideas?

If you also don’t like lack of height, consider these ways to lengthen your look: wear an up-do (avoid hair past your shoulders) and wear high heels (stating the obvious, but just in case!).

Waist Not Want Not

You can draw attention away from a full waist by raising, lowering, or eliminating the waistline.

This chiffon halter style gown also has eye catching neck detail at onlygowns.com.

onlygowns.com

The gown with sleeves pictured earlier is also a great example of this type of style.

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Who Says It Isn’t Easy Being Green?

Here are some wedding options that are both beautiful and eco-friendly (and often, economical, too!)

A Dress That Won’t Cost the Earth

Your dress doesn’t have to be made out of recycled tin cans to earn it’s green status. Look for dresses made from natural fibers, like the gowns from Tennessee company ‘Threadhead Creations’. Their dresses are made by hand from hemp, organic cotton, peace silk, and bamboo.

Go green with your gown: wear a hand-me-down!

Reconsider wearing that ugly dress of great grandma’s if your family will allow you to alter it’s design. Re-using fabric to create a new gown is a wonderful way to be eco-conscious. There are experts who specialize in restyling heirloom gowns, like the Illinois-based Treasures by Tina. The gown featured below was originally a high-necked, long-sleeved wedding dress from the 1960’s.

treasures-by-tina.com

What Kind of Metal is Your Love Made Of?

Did you know that “mining is a very “dirty” business and the production of one beautiful gold ring will generate five tons of environmental waste, contaminating water and lands which endangers the health and lives of humans and animals” (danforthdiamond.com).

Think Refined, Not Mined

Eco-conscious jewelers offer engagement and wedding rings that are made from 100% recycled precious metals, like the 14K white gold set below.

Warning: make sure the company can provide a certificate of authenticity!

Do the Earth a Favor

Don’t send your guests home with another useless knickknack… provide guest favors that are good for everyone! Here are some heart-shaped bird seed favors: a favorite for any feathered wedding crashers at  your garden/outdoor wedding! Or, guests can take them home and hang them outside their windows. These favors, from blissweddingsmarket.com, can be personalized with your name and a ribbon that compliments your wedding colors… If you buy at least 35 favors they are only $2.99 each - so they are nice to your wallet as well as the earth!

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Whenever I get flowers from my husband they mean the same thing; it doesn’t matter if they are roses, tulips, or (my favorite) gerber daisies -they all mean “I’m sorry”. But did you know that flowers have meanings?

For example, a red rose means “love and desire” while a carolina rose means “love is dangerous”. 

It’s About Time You Aster To Marry You!

teleflora.com

A symbol of love and patience, the Aster is perfect for the long engagement (2 or more years) or for the couple who has been together for a very long time prior to getting married. These beautiful flowers come in a wide range of colors. They are also a symbol for longevity because they are the anniversary flower for 20th wedding anniversaries. 

Shy Blossom

The Apricot Blossom can signify  feelings ranging from shy to downright frightened. They are an appropriate flower to wear in your hair if your dreams have come true and you  are timidly (is timidly a word?) walking down the aisle to marry your biggest crush. Still appropriate, but not as romantic, if you or your man is suffering from cold feet… 

If the Gloxinia Fits…

Gloxinia means “love at first sight” so if he loved you as soon as he seen ya, then Gloxinia is the one for you! 

Peachy Engagement Bouquet

According to iflorist.com a peach colored rose means “Let’s get together” or “The closing of the deal”…  Sounds like the perfect pairing with a diamond engagement ring! 

www.iflorist.com

Here We Go, ‘Round the Mulberry Bush… Oops, Did We Mention the Cliff on the Other Side?

Whatever you do, you don’t want to use Mulberry flowers in any of your wedding decorations because they mean “I will not survive you”. Are they poisonous or something? Don’t eat them, either, just in case! 

www.naturesongs.com

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The last installment in our Wild Wedding feature: this time we’re discovering that weddings can be a real beach!

How Deep Is Your Love?

Let’s start with some wave inspired jewelry for the occasion, like this unique yet under-stated wedding band. It is a stackable white gold wedding band with an S-shaped engraving around it, reminiscent of love that’s deeper than the ocean and that will outlast the tides.

Sing the Blues

Or, how about an engagement ring with side stones that are a deep blue, like the sea? Surround your beauty with round blue sapphires, like the diamond in this engagement ring.

Beach Themes Take the Cake

Your cake can play along, too, if you have a willing bakery and the idea of mixing sea creatures with cake doesn’t turn you seafoam green… I think starfish are a bit much, so here is a classier sample - I live the use of color too. This cake is from Patty - Cakes of Illinois.

pat-t-cakes.com

Here’s a slideshow of cakes that have waterfalls… not sure I like all the cakes but I’d sure like to hire the person on the synthesizer for my next big event!

And, To Top It All Off

This wedding cake topper is cute, and what makes it even better is that it can be customized to resemble the bride and groom. Your initials even get carved into the ’sand’.

magicalday.com

Favor These Favors

Here are some ideas for wedding favors. At 3 for $11.50, these palm tree candles aren’t too hot to handle - and they double as great table decorations for an outdoor casual or indoor tropical event.

sophiesfavors.com

Your Guests Can Have a Ball

If your wedding is more fun than fancy, this is a perfect fit.

weddingfavors.org

There are so many possibilities for weddings and water. But, please please please don’t let your wedding song be Easy Lover by Billy OCEAN. Dressing up as a mermaid and Neptune won’t wash, either, since Neptune was her dad! And on this theme I’m leaving you with a wedding that’s truly wet and wild- the happy couple got married on water skis!

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Another installment in our Wild Weddings series - this time we’re looking at plants. We’re not talking your common ordinary (boring) houseplants (the more exotic the better!).

Sustainable Centerpieces

A potted plant as a centerpiece is a symbol of enduring love and much more romantic than cut flowers, which fade and die before your honeymoon is even over (or worse yet, they are just thrown into a dumpster after the reception!).

amazon.com

Planted Around the Venue

Add some life to your party by renting plants. Small white lights make them an attractive feature in the evening. Palms add to a Hollywood nightclub feel - perfect for a romantic reception. Creativeplantrentals.com, based out of California, offers a service called “instant jungle”.  They will also rent you a 7 foot palm for around 80 dollars.

Welcome to the Jungle

Check out local themed gardens and wildlife parks - you may be able to get married in a jungle, amazon rainforest, or even say your vows with appropriately-dressed penguins (or perhaps monkeys in their own natural monkey suits!). If you get married at the Billabong Sanctuary in Australia you can have kangaroos, koalas, and wombats as wedding guests!

www.billabongsanctuary.com.au

Exotic Wear

This beautiful engagement ring and wedding band set is an art deco reproduction. I wish I had seen this when we were picking out our rings, I just love it. Notice the flower detail along the sides.

Or you could copy Carrie Bradshaw’s ill-fated wedding and just wear an exotic bird in your hair. (No wonder Mr. Big didn’t want to get out of the car!) I’m a big fan of Carrie and her friends and I usually admire their outfits but this is one that just doesn’t do it for me. You?

Destination Wedding, Hometown Reception?

If you are having a wedding somewhere warm, sunny and far away from home (Hawaii, Jamaica, Mexico) consider bringing that exotic them to the party you are having back at home. It will make your guests feel like they were there and tie the two events together.

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A new series we’ve started here at My Big Fat Engagement - Wild Weddings…

Last week we looked at Animals and Weddings and this week we’ll take a look at a different kind of wild life… flowers.

Sweet Treat

Looks like flowers but it’s really fruit - deliciously sweet and perfect for a wedding in a garden, a country inn, or the family cottage. You can order it online at ediblearrangements.com. This would also be a nice addition to a buffet-style reception dinner.

ediblearrangements.com

Edible Flowers

Or you could have your arrangements made out of edible flowers - waste not, want not, right? Perfect if, like me, cut flowers always make you a bit sad (they are dying after all). You can use potted plants as centerpieces (let guests take them home afterwards) or you can just ask the guests to snack on them instead! According to fairfaxfresh.com this arrangement is made from: Arugula, Calendula, Forget-me-not,  Lavender, and Violets (just a partial list, all edible).

fairfaxfresh.com

Exotic Wedding

Add some spice to your wedding by using exotic flowers. Perfect for an elegant setting or the hometown reception following a private destination wedding. These anthuriums add a unique look to any table - perfect for the classy and original couple.

tidysflowers.com

Hair’s an Idea

While we’re talking flowers - how about this beautiful hair accessory from pinupgirlclothing.com?

pinupgirlclothing.com

Flower Footsie

Add something special to your footwear for your wedding day - you can save money by dressing up a pair of shoes you already own.  Dying to wear vintage and frustrated that all the ladies had mini  feet back then? Get some vintage shoe clips instead! Etsy is a great source for shoe clips, I’ve just discovered - and now I want some!

BeadFloraJewels at Etsy

starzselection at etsy

Flower Delivery

Here are some different wedding invitations - they are handmade with pressed flowers. They are ecofriendly and can even include seeds so that your guests can plant the invitation and it will bloom. What a fantastic way to celebrate your future together - starting off on the right foot with a responsible environmental footprint.

custompaper.com

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Last week I wrote about Ring Bearers which reminded me that our dog, Buddy, was the ring bearer at our wedding. He was very cute and well-behaved, (didn’t eat the wedding rings or anything!) -until he suddenly started barking at me in the middle of the ceremony (I think it took him that long to recognize me - I guess I should dress up a bit more often!). 

This led me to think about all of the other ways that people incorporate the wilder side of life into their weddings and this is what I came up with:

Dove and Butterfly Release

There are businesses who will ensure that you have lovebirds or white butterflies (your choice) released at the end of your wedding. Very romantic. For local listings supplied by partypop.com, click here.

Catty Maid of Honor

When this couple renewed their vows, their maid of honor was a Siberian Tiger! Full story at vegparadise.com.

Animals as Wedding Favors

Well, not quite, but you can make a donation to a local animal shelter on behalf of each guest rather than purchasing wedding favors. New Jersey Popcorn Park Zoo is a refuge where abandoned or abused exotic animals are sheltered. When a wedding couple donate to them, each wedding guest receives a card that describes the donation plus one free admission to the zoo. Packets of Forget-Me-Knot seeds are also provided for the wedding tables.  Check with your favorite charity to see if they offer something similar, or just make a donation and print cards of your own!

Another option is Oxfam’s Unwrapped Program, where you can plant 50 trees for $30 (maybe one for each guest?) or plant a garden for $150 (perhaps one for each table?). You can print cards off of their website that explain the gift.  

The World Wildlife Fund is also set up for donations as wedding favors. You can also adopt an animal for the younger members of your wedding party and they receive a stuffed animal. 

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According to Wikipedia, the term ‘ring bearer’ is defined as the ‘attendant at a wedding who carries the ring(s)’. By this definition, the ring bearer could be any person (for example, sometimes the best man performs double duty and carries the rings as well) or even something else (a pet, a remote control airplane, who knows…?).

However, I think most of us think of a cute little boy accompanying the flower girl when we picture a ring bearer. 

Here are some cute ideas:

The Little Man

Match your Ring Bearer to the Grooms for a classy look that isn’t too cute-sy (but still pretty darn cute!). This would probably be the first choice if your Ring Bearer has any say in what he’s wearing - remember he doesn’t want to feel silly! 

Flowergirldressforless.com has quite a few suits that are like mini versions of the full size… 

flowergirldressforless.com

 Personalized Pillow

The ring pillow is often just symbolic (the real wedding rings are usually held by the best man for safekeeping ). However, it can become an heirloom that is passed down to weddings in later generations. Bumblebeelinens.com provides step by step instructions on how to make your very own ring pillow from handkerchiefs (which can be purchased at their site). 

bumblebeelinens.com

danforthdiamond.com

Unique Ideas

Paperposie.com is a great resource for children-related wedding items. They describe this teddy bear as a ring bearer gift but I think it would be a sweet replacement for the traditional wedding pillow: the rings could be attached by a ribbon around the bear’s neck. 

paperposie.com

Thank You Gifts 

Here is a cute shirt he can wear at the rehearsal dinner or any other wedding events… 

www.paperposie.com

Here’s another idea that will appeal to boys. This would be even better if a baseball game is part of your wedding activities or if your bride and groom (or the families) are big baseball fans!

www.bridalsalon.com

 Here’s a funny shirt for the ring bearer from a seller at cafepress.com: 

cafepress.com

Diamonds in the Rough

And after all of the preparation, this is what you might get… 

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Thinking about a prenup? Here are some ideas from real prenuptial agreements…

• random drug testing
• restrictions to watching sportsm (i.e. one game per week)
• no vacations with inlaws
• travel bonuses if spouse is caught cheating
• dollar amount penalty for each time he or she cheats
• weight limits
• cash for every year marriage continues
• custody of babysitter, dogs, household staff
• required minimum sexual activity each week
• waiving of child support responsibilities

Be warned, many of these stipulations would not actually hold up in a court room in most states. Yet, it seems that people are still including them and that they are often honored by the married couple.

Something to think about before you say ‘I DO’ and put on that wedding ring…

Sources:

Strange Prenuptial Agreements, Divorce360.com

10 Craziest Prenuptial Agreements, MyWedding.com

funny tie image, funnyties.com

Irish PreNup Song

PreNup Soap Opera Style

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Dresses

Flowergirl Princess.com has a huge selection of dresses. They also sell all of the accessories you will need, including: petticoats, gloves, and coats. Here is one of my favorites - a chocolate brown and pink dress that is very sweet:

flowergirlprincess.com

Here’s another pretty dress, perfect for a Spring wedding -

flowergirlprincess.com

flowergirldressforless.com

alfredangelo.com

Accessories

You can save time and money - buy all of your accessories online. Flowergirldressforless.com has a great variety of accessories for low prices.

Dainty Gloves

flowergirlprincess.com

Jewelry

danforthdiamond.com

Hair

flowergirldressforless.com

Baskets

childrenboutique.com

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