WaterFALL in love

You can rent a waterfall to add some ambience to your reception, or you can go wild and rent a rock climbing wall with a waterfall obstacle from a company like the funones.com, based out of Chicago.

This more subdued version of a waterfall for your wedding could include your initials or the first names of the bride and groom (available at gigis-party-rentals.com, Florida).

Waterfall with logo or initials

Tropic Thunder

When it comes to wedding planning, you always have a choice: you can go for the understated or you can go ‘big.’ In this case, you can rent ferns or you can rent a giant palm tree (or several giant palm trees!). Plantman.com provides “extravagant jungle tropics rental to the San Francisco and Los Angeles Areas” for as low as $750. Imagine a nine foot waterfall, a pebble bottom lagoon, fern-filled jungle grottos, a 16′ palm tree, and lush moss-covered rocks with ivy”.

For Beach, er, or For Worse

If the sun and surf are your definition of wild times, consider bringing the beach inside for your reception.

Or, if you anticipate that your  wedding reception will be a walk on the wild side, rent a surf machine and your guests can ride the waves without even getting wet! (Deluxe Big Wave Surf Machine from bigfunuk.info.)

Elegant Ring or Wild Bling

Both extremes may appeal to you – the subdued elegant wedding or the crazy, fun wedding- but what is the best fit for you as a couple? This is a day that you will remember for the rest of your life and it should symbolize everything about you as a couple. Are you more likely to go out for a fancy meal on a date, or are you more likely to go bungee jumping? What are you interests? One great way to establish the tone for your wedding: look at the engagement ring. The groom-to-be (hopefully) put a lot of thought into the ring when he picked it out – and (also hopefully) the bride loves it.

If the engagement ring is an impressive, but simply-designed and elegant solitaire – an elegant and tasteful wedding is best for you.

If the ring is bold and beautiful like this yellow gold engagement ring with a flower and petal design along the top and sides, then you probably have already arranged for live tropical birds and a waterfall for your reception!

For more ideas for wild weddings, check out this series:

Wet and Wild

Welcome to the Jungle

Wild Flowers

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We Love Hearing From Our Readers!

After reading “Unique Ways To Announce Your Engagement,” Amanda shared how she announced her engagement to her mom:

My boyfriend proposed via a [pictogram], so I sent a picture of the [it] to my mom by email and asked her if she could figure out the riddle. When she couldn’t, I sent a picture of my ring and told her that the picture might help her figure it out. She did.

We asked Amanda to send us a copy of the cryptogram. Here it is:

Pictogram Proposal

“Will you marry me?”

Amanda’s boyfriend took his best (screen)shot and she said “Yes.” Congratulations Amanda and Aaron! Who knew a computer could be so romantic? You two make such a cute couple!

Is He Speaking in Code?

Communication is so important in relationships, but sometimes it’s fun to use code. It can be very exciting to try to decipher a coded message, particularly when it has such a happy message. Sure, you can just get down on one knee and propose in short, clearly posed proposal (“Will You Marry Me?”) but why not make it your own unique memory?

Big Fat Ideas

Here are some of our own big fat ideas for how you can make your wedding proposal unique with codes and puzzles.

Please Mr. Postman – Letter Jumble

Cut out the letters for Will You Marry Me and then mix them up. Mail a few letters inside an envelope each day. Once your intended receives all of the letters they can start to rearrange them to decipher the message (they will probably start trying earlier, so keep this in mind when you decide which letters to send).

Another great idea: include some extras in each envelope – perhaps mementos of your time as a couple.

Crossword Question

If your special woman (or man) is into crosswords, you could make your own and have all of the answers relate to your couple-dom. You can do this yourself (use a program like Excel or an online program) or order online from a company like romancebetweenthelines.com.

Big Fat Examples

Are You In A Love HTML Relationship?

Here is one good example of a time when you are HAPPY that he is speaking to you in code (HTML code, that is…) The creators of the webcomic The Joy of Tech agree to use their powers for good by helping one of their readers propose to his girlfriend (click here to see the comic).

Image: Nitrozac and Snaggy, Joy of Tech, geekculture.com

Geek Love

In another example, perlmonks.org user Falkkin posts this:

Thirteen minutes later, user Vortacist replies with “Yes! ”

Spell It Out For Me

Not really ‘code,’ but this Wisconsin Marquette University student still gets an ‘A’ for effort.

We Want To Hear From You!

What do you think? Do you have an interesting story about that engagement ring on your finger?

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Black is the new White?

Black doesn’t have to be dark (see our earlier article about darker-themed weddings if that’s what you are looking for.). In the old days, black might have been a big “don’t” on the day you say “I do” but now it’s okay. More than okay, actually – black details on the big day can be brilliant. And, even better, when you incorporate the unusual into your wedding day, you often don’t have to buy it at a wedding store -making things much cheaper.

Here is an elegant cake from sedonaweddingcakes.com. The stylistic wedding cake topper is very classy and the black sugar roses are a nice touch. This cake would coordinate well with tables decorated with crisp white linens and black cloth napkins with white polka dots. This is another way to save money – some venues include white linens in their rental fee. If not, party rental companies usually charge less for white linens than for the colored specialty linens. If you are handy with a sewing machine, you can sew the cloth napkins your self. Don’t forget to launder them and iron them before the big day – a perfect job to delegate to a helpful friend, auntie, or even grandmother.

Wear something a bit racy under that demure white dress, like this black garter available from bachelorettesuperstore.com.

Your engagement ring or wedding ring could tie in to the color scheme as well, like this ring featuring black and white diamonds.

Or, wear some dark shoes and gloves with your dress for contrast! You could also add these accessories for the reception, particularly if you are having the event in the evening.

For example, here is a beautiful Alfred Angelo dress that would be perfect for a church wedding.

And here are some items to glam it up afterwards!

Black Shoes

Long Black Gloves

Like these ones from buycostumes.com.

A fascinating fascinator from folksy.com.

All of the ideas in this article would work for any color – imagine red as an accent instead of black. A little black purse would work, too (a bride needs somewhere to stash her lipstick too). A beaded drawstring purse would look great with the accessories above, perhaps a vintage purse – a great gift idea for the maid of honor to give to her best friend!

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It’s not for everyone, but here are some ideas for:

A Wedding That Walks on the Dark Side

Think skulls, black and other dark colors, and draw inspiration from The Day of the Dead, Halloween, and For more subtle ways to incorporate the color black into your wedding, please read next week’s article; “Black Tie Weddings“.

Here are some tips if you are going to the dark side:

Keep It Simple:

Restrict the decorations to one color and one or two images and stick with them, unless you want your wedding to look like a Halloween party. For example, you might select white skulls on a white backdrop for an elegant yet eerie look. Or black spiders on a black background would work well. Even better just use a spider web design, and leave the spiders out of the picture.

Go Crazy:

Or you can do the exact opposite and use every color out there. Use the rich vibrant palette of the Day of the Dead art as inspiration. Again, you might want to keep yourself to one or two images, but you can repeat them everywhere (a skull and a cross would work well, or a top hat and a fan). Colorfully printed fans would make great wedding favors and table decorations for the female guests. A cigar or a red boutonniere would be a nice gift for the men.

Til Death Do Us Part

If you’re a fan of the Day of the Dead (or just skulls), these custom-wrapped chocolate bars would be killer. You can order them from ChulaMichelle on Etsy.

Here Tooth-Decay, Gone Tomorrow

Here’s the perfect decoration for an engagement party near Halloween (or any time, if you have a sweet tooth). Also a fun way to display and offer a variety of sweet wedding favors. This candy cake is available from cookiepots.com at a very reasonable price. At less than $40 each, you could use them as table centerpieces in the place of flowers and wedding favors (which would easily add up to more than this price).

For Better or For Hearse

Cool wedding cake topper crafted by self-described ‘mantastic crafter’ Patrick Murillo.

For Richer For Gorier

This colorful skull cake is from bake me a cake.

Here’s another cake made by tiffanysbakingco.com – a hearse groom’s cake, but also could work as a wedding cake as well. Of course, it would be perfect for the wedding re-HEARSE-al (MWA Ha ha ha ha). Also, check out their traditional wedding cakes – delicious and beautiful looking!

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Attention: Brides to Be – Boxing Day is just a few days away!

Many stores now hold Boxing Day sales for a week. Online stores also have sales. This is the perfect opportunity to stock up on all of the things you will need for your wedding. Get a jump start on your wedding planning and save money.

Tips for Wedding Shopping on Boxing Day

Prepared to Shop?

Taking advantage of Boxing Day to ease your wedding budget makes sense as long as you already have a clear idea of what your wedding will be like. It doesn’t matter how far off your wedding is, you can start shopping if your wedding party has been selected and you know the size of your guest list.

It is also a fantastic time to shop for wedding rings – you can buy some beautiful wedding bands and engagement rings for reasonable prices at this time of  year. While you’re out there shopping, don’t forget to watch for gifts for your wedding party as well!

Wedding Colors

The more flexible you are, the more you save. If you are willing to select your colors based on what is available at a low price, you will save more money. If your wedding colors are popular then there will be more choices available to you, at lower prices.

Wedding Theme

Select your wedding theme from the wedding supplies available and you will save money.

Ideas – What Brides to Be Should Buy on Boxing Day

Wedding Time Capsule

A wedding time capsule is a great way to collect memories of your special day and then revisit them on an anniversary. You can order this time capsule at giftsnideas.com. Couponcodes4u says they are offering 15% all orders after Christmas (sale ends December 30).

Wedding Dress

Many bridal shops have Christmas and Boxing Day sales – this is the perfect time to get your dress! For example, if you buy your dress from bridalsbay.com during their boxing day sale, you can get dresses up to 75% off their list price. Check local stores in your city for big sales, too.

bridalsbay.com

Wedding Stationery

Everything at Mujka.ca is 50% off for Boxing Day – a site that sells templates you can buy to create your own wedding stationery (the invitation, rsvp card, thanks you card, reception card). A very reasonably-priced way to jump start your DIY wedding project!

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New Years Eve isn’t very far away – time to think about your resolutions. If you’re engaged, New Years Eve is the perfect catalyst for a relaxed and optimistic conversation about your future, so here are some New Years Resolutions For Your Marriage.

Hold Hands and Dream Big

Engaged couples spend a lot of time looking forward to their wedding and spending the rest of their lives together. This New Years Eve, make the following resolutions to help keep your marrriage happy.

1. Always Kiss Each Other Good Bye

Whether you’re on your way to work in the morning, or just stepping out to pick up some milk- take a moment to go over and say goodbye to your partner and give them a kiss.

2. Don’t Expect Perfection

Let’s face it, sometimes your Prince is going resemble a Frog; and sometimes your Princess is going to seem more like the Evil Queen… No matter how head over heels you are right now, it’s wise to keep in mind you are not actually marrying a perfect person. Marriage is not all or nothing – it’s success can’t be based on unreal expectations or ultimatums. A long marriage is based on mutual understanding, respect, and forgiveness. Truthfully, sometimes your mate will annoy the heck out of you! So just remember you don’t have to like him or her all the time, you just have to love them.

3. Promise To Support Each Other

bbc.co.uk

I’m not talking about financial support – although, sometimes this also comes into play. Most basically, I mean that when your partner talks about something he or she is passionate about – you actually listen. It doesn’t cost you a thing and the effect it has on your ‘other half’ and your life together is priceless. Also, if he or she wants to (take piano lessons, join a hockey team, enter a haiku contest, ride her bike across the country) you do what it takes to make it happen (watch the kids, put money aside, round up  all of your friends) and then when it happens you’re in the first row, cheering him or her on.

Did I miss anything?

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Last post, we gave you some proposal ideas for Christmas. Here are some ornaments to consider for the tree this year if she has already said yes.

Christmas Ornaments for Engaged Couples

Here’s a gift for your bride or husband-to-be to commemorate that moment when the engagement ring came out and the question was popped! You can hang it on your tree every year and remember those romantic exciting months when you were engaged to be married. Consider making it the first ornament in a tradition for your new family unit: add a new ornament to your tree each year to celebrate a special memory (first house, new baby, new pet, special visit from relatives, new job, graduation, move to another city, etc).

Here is a beautiful Christmas gift for your fiance – a collection of wedding ornaments with a personalized certificate. These ornaments from ornamentshop.com have a vintage look which makes them even more romantic.

Here is another classic looking ornament made from glass (also from ornamentshop.com).

ornamentshop.com

Did you buy that engagement ring at Tiffany’s? If so, your fiance can follow his purchase up with this ornament – the iconic blue gift box will always remind you to look down at the big rock on your finger and smile!

Here’s an ornament that you can personalize – available at personalizedfree.com. You can add your names (as pictured, below) and personalize the banner to say “Engaged!”  The banner message is up to you – you could even have it say “Will You Marry Me?” and use it to propose!

Another personalized option, this time from santasornamentshop.com.

Another great choice from ornamentshop.com: make sure you get a photo of your proposal and then remember it always in an ornament picture frame!

For more big fat advice, please read “Proposal Tips for Men and Christmas Proposals” and Christmas Gift Ideas for Newlyweds. Or, join us next week for a selection of Christmas ornaments to celebrate your engagement!

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Christmas can be very romantic: perhaps it’s all of the twinkling lights, the music, the good food, the cozy fireplaces… it all adds up to a perfect setting for a wedding proposal! Here are some ideas…

The Brightest Light On The Tree

Preparation: Hang the ring with a round ornament (string it through the hanger so that it rests on top of the ornament).

Proposal: Admire the tree together and ask her which ornament is her favorite. When it’s your turn, point out the one with the ring on it and wait for her to notice… when she does: drop to one knee!

Decoration Declarations

Ornament Sneak Attack

Preparation: If you already live together, sneak a “just married” ornament into your collection.

Proposal: Decorate the tree together and let her pick the new ornament up and wonder, “how did this get in here?” Don’t let her put it on the tree until she’s put your ring on her finger!

Just DIY Do It

Preparation: Paint ‘Will You Marry Me?’ on a glass ornament.

Proposal: Decorate a tree together and make sure she hangs this one up. Even better: get a group involved and make sure everyone else knows to let her pick up the proposal ornament!

I found this ‘will you marry me’ ornament for sale online if you’re not crafty…

Love Is Like a Box of Chocolates

Preparation: Remove one chocolate from a fancy box of chocolates and replace with the engagement ring instead. Set the stage: wrap the box and add a big bow (some candy stores offer this service) – make sure you send the message that this is not just any ordinary box of chocolates!

Proposal: Watch closely, she’ll see the ring and then look up at you – be ready to drop to one knee and ask her to be your wife!

Stocking Stuffer

Of course, if you spend Christmas morning together you can put the ring at the bottom of her stocking. Or, even better – put a pair of diamond earrings at the bottom of the stocking! While she’s still freaking out over the earrings, get on your knee, whip out the ring, and say “I was hoping they would go with this!” An engagement ring shouldn’t count as her Christmas present, after all – so the diamonds are a nice touch!

For more big fat advice, please read “Proposal Tips for Men and Christmas Proposals” and Christmas Gift Ideas for Newlyweds. Or, join us next week for a selection of Christmas ornaments to celebrate your engagement!

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A recent comment on an old post, ‘Worried About His Bachelor Party?’ inspired today’s post.

Well, Stargazer thank you for taking this article so seriously and taking the time to respond. However, I would like to point out that there are confident, smart women out there who are a bit nervous about the stag party because things can happen. For example I know someone who got slapped in the face with a trout on a fishing trip and showed up at his wedding with two black eyes. Drinks are involved and guests get over exuberant.

A bride to be who is worried that her husband might show up to the wedding with two black eyes is not plagued by low self esteem, she just doesn’t want anything to ruin her big day.

I can think of lots of reasons why she might not want to ‘set ground rules’ or to forbid specific activities and then ask him (and his friends) to respect her feelings. I think healthy relationships should include mature conversations and mutual decisions. And, if that isn’t going to work, I also don’t think there’s anything wrong with offering subtle suggestions or guidance to your partner (man or woman) because sometimes that just makes life easier than say, ordering them around. It’s good preparation for a long and peaceful marriage.

By the way, I’d also like to remind any readers out there that a mature and productive debate about a topic should also not include statements like your ideas are “ridiculous”, “get real”, or your ideas are “just plain stupid” – so if you’re going to talk to your guy about his bachelor party, stay away from this kind of language. People are less likely to want to cooperate with you, or listen to your perspective if your tone is condescending or you include insults or name-calling. If someone talked to me that way, I certainly wouldn’t marry them!

And, also, there are definitely places too remote for a stripper – unless they are willing to hike 15 miles into a campsite or kayak down a river with you. Perhaps Stargazer exaggerated for effect (which is very much in the spirit of my original article, so good one!).

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1. What religion are you?

Seriously – this is important because, even if your partner is currently ‘non-practising’, religion can become a big deal where wedding ceremonies, children, and marriage relationships are concerned.

2. How many kids are we going to have?

None? One? Eighteen (and counting!)? Also, you should discuss options in case it turns out you can not conceive the old-fashioned way. In Vitro? Adoption? You might be surprised at your partner’s answers to these questions – better to be surprised before you walk down the aisle…

3. How much money will we have as a couple?

(Or, worse, how much money will we owe?)

You don’t want to find out that you just married a huge amount of debt – or, at least, you want to be prepared ahead of time!

4. Does family play an important role in your life?

How often are you going to spend time with your inlaws? If they are long distance – how often will you be traveling to visit – or how often will they be visiting you? What is their financial situation like? (Will you be supporting them financially in any way in the foreseeable future?) Does your partner expect that his parents will move in with you when they need to be cared for? (If you have these same expectations about your parents, your house could get very crowded!)

5. How do you see us in 5 – 10- 20 years?

Does your partner want to change careers or go back to school? Does your partner want to travel the world after retirement or sit in a rocking chair on a front porch? Is your partner going to stay active or is your partner ready to settle down, put on 20 pounds, and relax after the wedding? Is your partner going to expect you to relocate to a different city (or country) to pursue his or her career? (Or, is your partner willing to do this for you?)

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